Alone Together

Reflections on Alone Together, by Sherry Turkle

The idea of connection versus isolation resonates with me. In the design research class, my group is investigating what people do while they wait on the streets of San Francisco. Not surprisingly, the most common response is that people turn to their phone while waiting; they pass the minutes with texting, tweeting, facebooking, and instagramming. Initially our assumption was that this behavior is common because people want to be connected with one another. Turlke’s book, Alone Together, demands that we reevaluate our assumptions. Do social networks and SMS messages bring us closer together, or are they a substitution for an actual connection? I was not surprised to read about the college student who would rather text her roommate from the other room than knock on her door. Admittedly, I have “friends” with whom I have never spoken to on the phone; all of our communication has been through text, email, or Facebook. Even though I have known these friends for over two years, I avoid calling them up just to chat. A phone call to certain friends would be too intrusive, and maybe even too intimate.

One point Turkle brings up repeatedly is that robots represent risk free relationships. To illustrate her point Turkle introduces us to Neela, the eleven year old girl who comments that “Girls are two-faced...They can’t make up their mind.” (94) And Howard, the high school student who believes a robot would provide him with more accurate advice that his father does therefore preventing disastrous interactions with girls (51). Risk can make us vulnerable, uncomfortable, and scared, but when we take risks and succeed we build trust in ourselves and in our relationships. The idea that technology is allowing us to be increasingly risk adverse causes me to worry about my own communication patterns; however, the biggest question is, what happens when a person grows up without needing to take risks?